Showing posts with label addictions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label addictions. Show all posts

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Addictions: An Ayurvedic Perspective (Part 2)

In part one, we mentioned that addictions are a problem of object referral versus self-referral in an exaggerated manner. Most of us suffer from a mild form of object referral and waver between object and self-referral. But in addictions, object referral is king. The object of addiction is almost seen as a god, taking precedence over any other thing, including a spiritual connection.  

Object referral is an association of oneself with something outside of us. For example, you will hear people say, I’m a doctor, a lawyer, a plumber, a student. Or you might hear one say, I have three children, I am Italian, or I have a bachelor’s degree. Yet again, you might hear about someone’s possessions or net worth. I have a four-bedroom house in the country, I have $20,000 in a retirement fund or even, I’m poor and broke. While all of these statements may be true, according to Vedanta or Vedic thought, this doesn’t represent YOU as a whole. It’s a part of who you are, but it isn’t you. 

Here is the problem with object referral. If the object of my association to myself is no longer present, then I lose the sense of who I am. For example, if you say you are a bank teller and you’ve been a bank teller for 20 years, what happens if you suddenly lose your job? Most people who associate themselves with their job title or position and then lose it, find they are lost. But if you do, in fact, lose your job and have associated your sense of self and self-worth by that job, after time you will probably come to realize that you are not so bad after all, even jobless. 

However, the object referral in addictions is even stronger. There is a concept in Vedanta called pragnyaparadha, which means “mistake of the intellect”. The disconnect with your true self or higher self is so far removed that in order to feel whole, we crave the object of addiction as if it were a true need. The intellect has been tricked to believe that it needs the object of addiction to be whole. 

In object referral, we are disconnected from who we truly are. 

Self-referral is the first step away from addictions. Self-referral is the knowledge that I am perfect the way that I am. You are perfect the way you are, because the creative source that orchestrates the dance of the entire universe, including you, is pure perfection. Self-referral needs no input from the outside to feel whole. The connection to your divine essence makes you this way. Without knowledge of self-referral, we cannot begin to peel away the stickiness of addictions. 

In your uniqueness, you are connected to others. You are connected to your spirit, the collective spirit and the universal spirit. You are divinity itself. That is self-referral. You are an individuated expression of the divine who needs to remember your divinity. 

Self-referral is truth. Object referral is a lie. Self-referral leaves you whole. Object referral leaves you empty and craving more. Self-referral is healing. Object referral precipitates death. Object referral is slavery. Self-referral is the ultimate freedom. 
Remembering who you are is the essence of reconnecting to your true self. In Addictions: An Ayurvedic Perspective (Part 3) we will explore how to overcome your addictions forever. 

Wishing your perfect health always,

Michelle Fondin
Founder of The Ayurvedic Path
Vedic Master

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Addictions: An Ayurvedic Perspective (Part 1)

According to the Merriam-Webster, an addiction is described as a strong and harmful need to regularly have something or do something. 

Addictions come in all shapes and forms. Some are less harmful than others. And some are more toxic. But they all have one thing in common, addictions trick the mind to think that a need is being fulfilled. I find it interesting that the dictionary chose the word “need”. 

A need is something we all need to survive and thrive. We have physical needs such as food, clean water, bodily comfort and shelter. We have emotional needs for love, security, safety, affection, acceptance, appreciation and acknowledgement. We have spiritual needs for peace, connection to others and/or a higher being, belonging, and a sense of purpose and meaning in life. 

But the object of addiction is a false replacement for what we ultimately need. In an instant, the addiction can fulfill an immediate need such as the need for love (sex addiction), the need for comfort (alcohol or food addiction), the need for security (a gambling addiction, where the gambler wins a lot then tries to win more) or the need for acknowledgement (internet, social media addiction). 

What is so attractive about an addiction or addictive behavior? 


1. They are a quick fix. 

Have you heard of avoidance therapy? We avoid dealing with the real need at hand, so we mask the need with the object of addiction. Fulfilling a need often takes a bit more effort of discovering the real need and finding healthy ways to fulfill it. 


2.  They have real appeal.

The object of addiction makes us feel really good for the time being, but makes us feel bad after the effect wears off. (i.e. overeating causes weight gain or diabetes, alcohol abuse causes depletion of finances, alienates loved ones etc.) 

3. They change our chemistry or neuro-associative conditioned reactions.

Drug, alcohol or food addictions literally change our bio-chemistry which causes us to crave them more, even though the addiction is not good for the body. Addictions like gambling, sex, internet over-usage, or excessive gaming give us an initial rush of excitement which condition our minds to crave that excitement. 

4. They temporarily fulfill an immediate need. 

As humans, we are needs driven. We will only do something if it fulfills a need. However, addictions seemingly fulfill a need, but in the end leave us more “needy”. For example, an addiction to internet and social media or gaming, may fulfill the need for significance and acknowledgement in the immediate sense. But when you realize you’ve been consecrating several hours daily to these activities, you’ve ignored a whole host of other needs, like working effectively at your job or spending time with your kids or spouse. 

But ultimately, addictions leave us weak, ashamed, sometimes broke, and with a loss of integrity and self-worth. Addictions leave us disconnected from our true selves. We forget who we really are and act as if we are alone. 

Ayurveda takes the perspective that an addiction is an extreme penchant toward object referral instead of self-referral. In the next blog post on Addictions: An Ayurvedic Perspective, I’ll explain the difference between object referral and self-referral .

Wishing you a beautiful day and perfect health always,

Michelle Fondin